You know that naked dream you had when you were in middle school, where you were standing at the assembly or some equally public place and all off a sudden you were stark naked?
On a scale of 1 to ‘That Dream’, what I am
going to tell you would score ‘That Dream’ on the embarrassment scale.
Except it wasn’t a dream. Ugh!
And it happened at Toys R Us. Of Course.
And I am just one of the gazillion Moms in the world this has happened to.
So we were at Toys R Us yesterday. At the checkout counter paying for the toys that the children had begged that they absolutely cannot live without. Until they reached home and cast them aside and then went on playing with the bubble wrap and empty toilet roll tubes which fascinate them.
Ajit was paying the bill, cos you know cool Moms like me don’t carry wallets. We carry cool shit like baby wipes and water bottles, yo. And sticky, melted Menthols in our bags.
Ryan was keeping to himself and being a good boy. And then I noticed that Stevie was looking at me. He smiled this little angelic smile and asked “Hey Amma, what is that?”
It must have been the air conditioning at the mall or something, because at that moment I felt an inexplicable love for him and I bent down to his height and asked smiling “What, Stevie?”
Cue, there was a Johnson&Johnson ad music playing in my head and the moment was beautiful and I wished someone would take out their phone and click this moment.
Then Stevie shot out his hand and touched my breast, pressed it and asked, “This. What is this?”
At this point the tune in my head
changed to this. Well for a clearer understanding you will need to watch the video. The tune begins at 30s.
I straightened up quickly and hissed at him “Don’t ever do that Steve.”
Stevie just stood there puzzled. Wondering. And then he slowly raised his arm and brought it to his chin and looked at his elbow. Then he looked at my chest and said, “Ohhhhh…so that’s like an elbow …”
And I said yes yes it’s an elbow. Now come along now…
Author’s Note: BTW, my little inquisitive child turns 3 on Monday. What’s up with that? Wasn’t he just born yesterday? And I had written this. Sigh…
Happy Weekend to all.